Lost Masterpieces Found In Wisconsin Basement!

A group of special trained U.S. troops uncovered a treasure of original paintings by obscure master Tom Hicks. Army personnel at the scene would not comment on the raid of a suburban home in Waukesha, Wisconsin. Neighbors who were interviewed at the scene said that four dark vehicles were seen parked at odd angles in front of the house and that several men in camouflage uniforms stormed the front of the home early in the morning. Neighbor Mr. Albert Pernifesky told reporters, ”One of them guys looked like George Clooney. So I think maybe it was all part of that Nazi movie about stolen art. I always thought that the guy who lives here was strange. You’d see him cutting his lawn while wearing a monocle and an army helmet. He had a German shepherd dog that was always by his side. For a long time we thought he was just some blind guy with a head injury.”

An Army spokesperson at headquarters issued a statement saying that six paintings were confiscated and there is an ongoing investigation into the recovery of the paintings and the owner of the home, Otto Von Mittenberger. Von Mittenberger has been detained as a “person of interest”. The Army insists that George Clooney had taken no part in the raid. Our report team was able to photograph the paintings and translated the German titles into English for our readers: