Idiot Savant Paints Masterpiece While Locked in His Basement!

Happy New Year, Everyone!

While you were celebrating your Earth Holidays, I have been busy painting. Below are four new works that I decided to share with you before my automaton stores them into my space vehicle. The same robot will upload these images into the Art Gallery section of this site. I’ll need to program it first. These automatons are like pets, aren’t they? Ah, maybe I’m just lonely and sentimental as I write this tonight.

Anyway, I’ve decided to take a break from painting and to do a little more writing. The writers that follow this Blog are getting impatient for a good story. (Really. They wrote me and asked for a “good story”…) So that’s what I intend to give them.

It’s been difficult to paint recently because I’ve been spending large amounts of time sending distress signals to Aarkon via the Tin Foil Hat, which gets in the way while painting.

So now I’ll introduce you to my latest work … Continue reading

Our Mermaid Travels to Vietnam

Yes. As part of our world trade mission, we sent our Arts Ambassador to Vietnam to let the people know we’re not holding any grudges, and as you can see here … neither are they. Right after this photo was taken, the little guy on the right asked to trade shirts and wear the “Smells Like Fish” shirt. There’s no doubt that the Vietnamese people appreciate fine art.

Smells Like Fish T-Shirt
Smells Like Fish T-Shirt
$20.00
Mens Size :
Hand Signed by the Artist :

My Good Friend Pablo

IMG_0904A lot of you may not know it, but Pablo and I were friends for some time before I took him fishing. We both enjoyed creating stuff, painting mostly. We looked alike too. Although I was younger, I also had that silly, dark-eyed stare that he became known for.

I had filled-in for him at several public appearances in New York in ‘61 while he was in Europe accepting the International Lenin Peace Prize for the second time. We really laughed about that later. And when he married Jackie (Jacqueline Roque) that year, I suggested that I substitute for him in the bridal bed that same evening. “Come on, Pablo. You’re 69 years-old for Christsakes!” I said. He lit another Balto, blew smoke in my face while coughing, and said, “69 says love, too.” Continue reading

NEWS FLASH…NEWS FLASH…NEWS FLASH

Aarkonian Queen to visit Earth in January

IMG_1282Her Royal Highness, Queen Jennifer, of the Planet Aarkon will begin a scheduled tour of events beginning in New York soon after our planet New Year.

Photographed here after returning from an all-galaxy trade tour of inhabited planets, Her Highness shows-off one of the artistic wraps she has been promoting throughout our galaxy. Continue reading

Where Ya’ Been?

My last communication was about the bachelor party I attended and my near death experience caused by the exotic dancer, Finger Lickin. If you missed it, it’s still on this Blog titled: The Party’s Over.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERASince that time I have been fighting the disease Leukemia. The doctors have been punching holes into my Aarkonian flesh and bone. They measure and scratch their heads. They meet with each other, they collaborate, they sit at a table and stare at each other while scratching their heads, and finally agree on a diagnosis: “Whatever this thing is, it’s got a couple of Earth years left to live.”

I’m not convinced. We Aarkonians are a tough bunch. So, I’ve sent a distress signal to my home and have now resumed my mission: (Please pinch your nose here and slowly read the next sentence out loud:) “To observe the American Earthlings and report my findings to the King of Aarkon.” Continue reading

Doctor Bronski in London?

Reggy Glitt, London, England, sent us this photo with a note recently: “I’ve been wearing this shirt with my lampshade cap to pubs and parties since I got it. They all want it and the blokes love it, too. Bloody good fun, eh?”

Doctor Bronski T-Shirt
Doctor Bronski T-Shirt
$20.00
Mens Size :
Hand Signed by the Artist :